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Harassment, Inappropriate Messages, and Reporting on the App

If you receive a message that makes you uncomfortable, know this from the start: you did nothing wrong. You are not obligated to reply, justify yourself, or explain why the message bothers you. You have the right to block, to report, and to protect your peace of mind. This article gives you simple, concrete actions for responding to harassment or inappropriate messages on a dating app.

Understanding what’s unacceptable (and what should be reported)

Not all behavior is acceptable, even online. Here’s what should be reported:

Harassment: repeated insistence despite your silence or refusals, aggressive follow-ups, pressure to get a reply or a date.

Sexist comments or unsolicited sexualization: inappropriate remarks about your body, sexist jokes, sexual messages from the very first exchanges when you asked for nothing of the sort. In the United States, 81% of women report having experienced at least one form of sexual harassment in their lifetime (source).

Threats or intimidation: any message that makes you feel unsafe, whether explicit or disguised.

Blackmail: emotional (“if you refuse, it means you don’t care about me”), sexual, or conditional (“if you want to see me, you have to…”).

Attempts to get personal information: insistence on knowing your address, your workplace, your social media, or other details that could identify you.

Impersonation, scams, requests for money: fake profiles, invented stories to obtain money or favors.

In fact, Americans overwhelmingly see this as a problem that platforms need to take seriously: 79% say social media companies are doing only a fair or poor job of addressing online harassment (source).

Emergency Resources

Websites that can help

Numbers to know

  • 7726 (SPAM) : forward unwanted spam texts to this number
  • 800-799-7233 - National Domestic Violence Hotline : for information and advice, 24/7 (or text START to 88788)
  • 844-878-2274 - CCRI Image Abuse Helpline : for help with revenge porn, sextortion, deepfakes and image-based abuse, 24/7

In immediate danger: call 911.

What to do right away when you receive an inappropriate message

Don't feel obligated to reply or justify yourself. You can simply end the conversation.
Take screenshots of the key messages, note the person's username, the date and the time. These elements can be useful if you need to file a police report or if the harassment continues.
Use the app's block feature. This prevents the person from contacting you again.
Use the app's report feature. Choose the right reason (harassment, inappropriate messages, threats) and add context if needed. A good report genuinely helps moderation.
Check your privacy settings: who can message you, which filters you can turn on, what information is visible on your profile.

How to report effectively: what actually helps moderation

A good report takes 30 seconds and lets the moderation team act quickly.

  1. Screenshots of the key messages: no need for the whole history, just the problematic messages.
  2. Give context: is it repetitive? Is it escalating? Is there a direct threat?
  3. Mention any sensitive info shared: if the person obtained your phone number, your Instagram, your city, or other personal information, report it.
  4. Stay factual: avoid personal attacks in the report text. Just describe what happened.

When you’re a woman and you receive threatening or sexist messages

It's not "just humor." You can cut it short. Your priority is your safety and your mental load. You don't have to educate the person.
  • If there's an explicit threat, a mention of your location, or pressure for a date: report and block immediately.
  • If the person is trying to get your address or workplace: don't reply. Secure your information. Check what your profile reveals.
  • If you feel in danger: contact a trusted person and call 911.
Among U.S. adults under 30, 64% report having experienced some form of online harassment (source). You are not alone.
If you'd like to reply before blocking, here are three messages you can copy-paste:
  • "This message is inappropriate. I'm stopping here."
  • "I'm not comfortable. All the best."
  • "I don't share personal info. Goodbye."
Before meeting someone, check for the warning signs: pressure to meet quickly, early jealousy, disguised insults, rapid sexualization of the conversation. Never share your address, your daily routine, your exact workplace, or information about your children. For the first date, choose a public place, tell someone close to you, and make sure you have your own way to get home.
If the person behaves in a worrying way after the date, here's what to do: Cut off contact and report: use the app's features to block and report. Keep the evidence: if the person keeps messaging you, save screenshots. If the harassment continues off the app: block the person everywhere (texts, social media) and document everything.
Here's what you can expect after reporting a profile: Acknowledgment: the app reviews your report. Possible measures: a warning to the profile in question, restriction of certain features, temporary or permanent account suspension. Confidentiality of sanctions: you won't always see the details of the actions taken. That's normal — platforms protect the confidentiality of all users. In fact, 81% of Americans agree that laws should be strengthened to hold perpetrators of online hate and harassment accountable for their conduct (source).
Receiving aggressive or threatening messages can cause shock, anger, or anxiety. That's normal. Give yourself a break. Talk to someone you trust. Ask for help if you feel the need. You have the right to use the app at your own pace, or to take a break if you need one.

At Match, safety and privacy are built into your experience from the start:

  • Location data used first and foremost to suggest relevant profiles, in line with the purposes you choose
  • Settings that are easy to change and fully transparent
  • Robust reporting and blocking systems
  • Human moderation and anti-harassment prevention tools
  • Strict data protection standards and a privacy-by-design approach

The goal? A dating experience that’s enjoyable, respectful, and fully in your control.

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