Learn From Gay Guys

Men, we could learn a few things from our brethren. Here are five things women really wish we knew

By Analise Pendergast

y little sister is hot. She's cute, smart, in shape, successful and she wants a boyfriend. Do you want to know what she says about finding a man?

“All the hottest guys are either taken, or they’re gay.” But wait—not you. You’re straight, you’re single and
Make yourself somebody she'll want to get next to.
you’d like to get her phone number, right?

Right. And you shaved, like, three days ago? That ancient T-shirt is threadbare. You’d sooner pop a can of beer than uncork a bottle of Beaujolais. You’ve slacked on exercise. You watch the tube slumped on that old plaid sofa, the one your ex-roommate abandoned. And I’m supposed to give you her number?

What am I, nuts?

Sorry guys, but the gig is up. Women aren’t willing to overlook the baggy boxers and the bachelor-sty anymore. Women want their man to be fine—to have some panache like those cute gay guys do. After all, what girl wouldn’t want a well-groomed man with great hair, a tasteful sense of style and a terrific place?

And so, we ladies have asked our gay male friends to suggest a few tips. Why gay guys? Face it, they’ve really got the edge here.

But don’t worry—nobody’s trying to get you to switch teams. Just think of yourself as, say, a sexy classic Corvette going in for a wash, wax and tune-up. Tighten this, polish that and women will find you impossible to ignore.

To up your hetero-sex-appeal, our gay buddies want you to know that:

Schlump-Chic is out
Recharge your wardrobe, and show you’re someone who actually cares about looking presentable. No need to get fancy—a few updated classics with a flattering fit will work wonders. And buy yourself some sexy new skivvies—you know, like the ones in those ads at the bus stop that women can’t stop staring at.

Cleanliness is manliness
Women appreciate good grooming. Before you reach for her hand, scrub under your fingernails. Take a shower and brush your teeth. Make yourself
Women like a man who knows what to do.
somebody she’ll want to get next to.

Hair, done right, is hot
Get a good, contemporary, professional haircut. And keep it up, even if it means getting that goop on your hands. No matter how many hairs grow on your head, there are ways to make it look hip if you know what to do. And women like a man who knows what to do.

The dwelling is compelling
If you want her to come back to your place a second time, don’t scare her away the first time. Ditch the dead sofa and get something grown-up. Roll a fresh coat of paint on the walls and hang a framed art print or two. Clean, deeply, everywhere. Women love spaces set up with style, and a touch of class.

Entertaining is not rocket science
Even if you can’t boil water without burning it, you can certainly go to the store and pick up some wine and cheese and crusty French bread. Serve this effortless indoor picnic in that revamped living room, and she’ll know you’re a real class act.

See, that’s not so hard, is it? Gracefully accept these hot hints from your gay brethren, and transform yourself into a straight guy with a great groove.

And then maybe, just maybe, I’ll think about writing down that phone number.

Analise Pendergast is a freelance writer specializing in topics of sexuality and relationships. She offers writing workshops for women called Sex, Lies, & Language.
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