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lislis47

lislis47

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Active over 3 weeks ago

25 year old woman
Los Angeles, California, United States

Seeking:
men 25-35
Within:
50 Miles of Los Angeles, California, United States
Relationship:
Never Married
Have kids:
No
Want kids:
Someday
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
Body type:
About average
Height:
5'6" (167cms)
Faith:
I'll tell you later
Smoke:
No Way
Drink:
Social Drinker

 

ABOUT HER & WHO SHE'S LOOKING FOR

I'm not sure what I'm getting out of Match anymore, so I'm going to say whatever's on my mind here and you can think what you'd like.

First off, I got a lot of messages from a lot of cool guys that I didn't respond to because I was busy with life and stopped checking Match. That sucks for all parties involved. It's real easy to disassociate with the people on the other end of the interwebz since messages never have a vibe or energy or chemistry, and I've learned that this is important to me. I'm not in to vibes in that "What's your sign?" sort of way, but it's definitely important. It's important to a lot of people, according to your profiles, but how do you describe the right kind of energy that you're attracted to? I've met plenty of guys who like the same things I do on paper but don't mesh with me, and I've meshed with plenty of guys who couldn't write an articulate essay to save their life. How do you pin that special something down?

You're thinking, "Well, meet in person," but the problem with that is the expectations. You meet me with the thought that I could be the love of your life, and I meet you with similar aspirations. We build each other up, analyze, try to figure it out while acting on our best behavior, and in the end it doesn't seem like either one of us was our honest self. I almost want to ask people to hang out with me, but I don't think many of you would take the offer. I think that if I said that, many of you would try to 'crack' me the whole time. This is not a site to make friends, it is a site to find long term relationships.

When I joined Match I whole heartedly jumped in. I went on at least one date a week, with the same person consecutively if I thought it would work out or with another suitor. Then I got discouraged, and slacked off on replying to e-mails. It's a lot of effort to put yourself out there; I'm an introvert and consider myself loyal and devoted to people I love, but that first step takes energy for me. And, at first, it was new and exciting and thrilling... but once you realize that you have to start back at square one with the talks about the weather and LA traffic, it gets to be a bit draining.

Even getting to that point of wanting to date is draining. Half the e-mails I get are only a few sentences, and most of them just say that I'm cool, or interesting, or cute. Pretty much exactly that, without any reference to my profile, or they copy/paste something and say they like it. Few return information about themselves. Even fewer give me a jumping off point to get into a good e-mail conversation, and those asking for a date right out the gate show very little thought. I even have the occasional guy who copy/pastes the same intro, one I know he sends to dozens of other girls because less than a month later he'll copy/paste the same intro to me again.

A lot of you probably feel lost, too. I bet it's difficult trying to attract the types of women you want. I bet it's difficult to articulate the woman you want or, if you know, how to state your needs in a way that doesn't make you sound like an @$$hole. I find myself gravitating towards Latinos, Asians, or Mid Western guys because they tend (in my experience) to have a strong sense of family, responsibility, loyalty, dedication, and emotional awareness of self while being respectful of women. I find myself disliking most guys who are LA natives. I want to describe everything I want, because I know what that is, but I don't want to put myself out there on the internet to hundreds of strangers who I know will not understand.

Gee, that sure was a lot of ranting. Maybe it'll get me some cool conversations and a new friend or two. Maybe I'll just get less e-mails and won't have to worry about answering. What's an interesting article you've read recently and why?

Interests:
Alumni connections, Coffee and conversation, Business networking, Cooking, Dining out, Hobbies and crafts, Movies/Videos, Museums and art, Exploring new areas, Nightclubs/Dancing, Performing arts, Shopping/Antiques, Travel/Sightseeing, Volunteering
Sports & exercise:
Aerobics, Dancing, Running, Yoga
Exercise habits:
I exercise 1-2 times per week
Pets:
Political views:
I'll tell you later
Sign:
Don't display my sign
College:
I'll tell you later
For fun:

I like to go to shows/performances, or watch tv, or craft, or read. My friends and I make short movies sometimes, which is great because it involves all of my aforementioned hobbies. Museums are great, too :)

Last read:

Last read was Ender's Game. For some reason there were a lot of classics I never read in school, so I'm going back and getting through them. Other recent reads: Fountainhead, Slaughterhouse 5, and The Things They Carried (again)

ABOUT... HER HER DATE
APPEARANCE:
Height:
5'6" (167cms)
5'7" (170cms) to 8'11" (271cms)
Body type:
About average
No preference
Eyes:
Hazel
No preference
Hair:
Dark brown
No preference
   
LIFESTYLE:
Smoke:
No Way
No preference
Drink:
Social Drinker
No preference
Occupation:
Administrative / Secretarial
Executive / Management, Financial / Accounting / Real Estate, Labor / Construction, Legal, Political / Govt / Civil Service / Military, Sales / Marketing, Self-Employed / Entrepreneur, Education / Teacher / Professor, Technical / Science / Computers / Engineering, Other profession, Nonprofit / Volunteer / Activist, Law enforcement / Security / Military, Architecture / Interior design

I work for a smaller company, which is great because you get to know everyone and care about what they do.

Income:
I'll tell you later
$50,001 to $75,000, $75,001 to $100,000, $100,001 to $150,000, $150,001+
Relationship:
Never Married
Never Married
Have kids:
No
No answer
Want kids:
Someday
Someday
   
BACKGROUND/VALUES:
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
No preference
Faith:
I'll tell you later
No preference
Languages:
English
English
Education:
Bachelors degree
Bachelors degree, Graduate degree, PhD / Post Doctoral

I went to a small liberal arts private college, with the help of a generous grant. I got my BA in English, but I took a lot of awesome classes that expanded my world view.

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