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Rev Up Your love Life With These Tips!

_Cobrakai_

FACT: The way girls greet each other normally is how I would act if I saw a friend I thought was dead.

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Active within 1 week

35 year old man
Kirkland, Washington, United States

Seeking:
women 24-34
Within:
20 Miles of Kirkland, Washington, United States
Relationship:
Never Married
Have kids:
No
Want kids:
Someday
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
Body type:
About average
Height:
6'0" (182cms)
Faith:
Spiritual but not religious
Smoke:
No Way
Drink:
Social Drinker

 

ABOUT HIM & WHO HE'S LOOKING FOR

I find that most people are surprised to learn that there's a lot more to me than just my limitless upper body strength, and shockingly toned buttocks, so I hope you don't judge me by my looks, and will take the time to read my profile.

The other night I woke up to the drunk crying and yelling of "you never even loved me, you only loved the IDEA of me!" from my neighbors boyfriend... keeping in mind that he's 5'4, 100lbs, is a spot-on Joe Dirt look-alike, and I come home everyday to see his unemployed ass passed out on the patio (covered in empty cans of keystone light with can of Kodiak chewing tobacco resting on his chest), I'm pretty sure Walmart is the only thing on this earth that has ever "loved the idea of him."

I have another neighbor that I'm pretty convinced is a dark wizard. I would be 100% certain if it weren't for the fact that he rollerblades around the parking lot in a fluorescent robe from time-to-time.

As you've probably already figured out, I'm not really good at this whole profile thing. About myself, I enjoy hiking if you couldn't tell from the pictures I've posted. I created this profile about 10 years ago, so when I logged back in to check it out again I quickly noticed that I was a lot younger and far more attractive. Therefore I thought I would be fair and update with pictures from last summer. You won't find any from the past couple months, because once summer ends and it gets cold I go from "decent shape" to "closely resembles Grimace from McDonalds."

Although in the spring and summer I enjoy being outdoors (hiking, camping, fishing, travel, etc), in the winter I enjoy hibernating for the cold seasons and watching my tv shows, movies, and playing video games from time to time. Oh, and football of course. I also enjoy writing in my spare time, and have ran a successful blog for several years. I also freelance for The Onion and College Humor, just to give you an idea of the writing I excel at, or at least the writing I'm most proud of. I really enjoy making people laugh.

As for what I'm looking for, I want to find someone that I can be best friends with, and that enjoys the same activities I do. I'm very sarcastic and witty, so if you aren't of the same mindset, I'm quickly going to get bored and lose interest with you. Either that, or you'll probably get pissed off at me and kick my ass. I'm also looking for someone that is honest, loyal, and knows how to communicate without starting fights. I'm very anti-drama, so if drama "mysteriously" enters your life constantly, move on.

Random musing about myself and life in general since I'm bored tonight. Just because you're not interested in messaging me doesn't mean you can't learn something, right?!

- I honestly can't think of anything worse than getting a bunch of Jeopardy questions right and having no one around to witness it.
- Making a Facebook page for your baby is a great way to tell the world that you are in no way fit to be a parent.
- Don't knock on my door. This isn't 1986, it's 2013, text me saying you're outside like a normal person.
- Don't wear a red polo and khakis to Target. Ever.
- I swear to god if I was bidding on The Price is Right, and someone bid $1 more than me, I would attack them right in front of the live studio audience.
- Nothing says "I'll never be financially stable" better than a vanity license plate on a shitty car.
- At this point, its pretty safe to assume that no one under the age of 25 knows the definition of "literally."
- Your own personal hell is never truly realized until you have listened to the Toys R Us song on repeat for 15 minutes while waiting on hold.

Interests:
Camping, Coffee and conversation, Dining out, Movies/Videos, Music and concerts, Exploring new areas, Playing cards, Playing sports, Travel/Sightseeing, Video games, Watching sports
Sports & exercise:
Baseball, Basketball, Billiards / Pool, Bowling, Football, Running, Swimming, Walking / Hiking, Weights / Machines, Other types of exercise, VolleyBall
Exercise habits:
I exercise 1-2 times per week
Pets:
Political views:
Middle of the Road
Sign:
Capricorn
College:
I'll tell you later
For fun:

Hiking, camping, sporting events, movies, coffee, video games

Favorite hot spots:

Fremont, Ballard, Kirkland

Favorite things:

Hiking, watching football, relaxing in front of the tv for a movie/tv, poker, hanging out with friends.

Last read:

Probably a walking dead comic book, hot...

ABOUT... HIM HIS DATE
APPEARANCE:
Height:
6'0" (182cms)
5'0" (152cms) to 5'8" (172cms)
Body type:
About average
Slender, About average, Athletic and toned
Eyes:
Brown
Blue, Brown, Green, Hazel
Hair:
Dark brown
Black, Light brown, Dark brown, Blonde, Dark blonde, Platinum
   
LIFESTYLE:
Smoke:
No Way
No preference
Drink:
Social Drinker
No preference
Occupation:
Executive / Management
No preference

HR Operations Lead

Income:
I'll tell you later
No preference
Relationship:
Never Married
No preference
Have kids:
No
No
Want kids:
Someday
Definitely, Someday, Not sure
   
BACKGROUND/VALUES:
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
No preference
Faith:
Spiritual but not religious
No preference
Languages:
English
English
Education:
Bachelors degree
High school, Some college, Associates degree, Bachelors degree

I have a double major in Business Administration, and Psychology... and a minor in HR and Marketing. I'm currently in the process of going back for my MBA.

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