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I_love_Baltimore

Non-shallow guy looking for a non-shallow gal... just make sure you aren't poor or fat.

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Active over 3 weeks ago

31 year old man
Lutherville, Maryland, United States

Seeking:
women 23-35
Within:
20 Miles of Lutherville, Maryland, United States
Relationship:
Never Married
Have kids:
No
Want kids:
Definitely
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
Body type:
About average
Height:
5'9" (175cms)
Faith:
Christian / Catholic
Smoke:
No Way
Drink:
Moderately

 

ABOUT HIM & WHO HE'S LOOKING FOR

DO NOT CONTACT ME IF YOU LIKE TO HAVE FUN! If you like to be depressed we can do it together. I hate activities. Also, I cry a lot...especially at barbecues (i don't know why). Interesting fact: I love exotic foods. One time, I ate a whole baby in one sitting. I once took a bite of giraffe tail but it was gross....the worst part is that I was never allowed back at the zoo. I absolutely love to travel and have seen such places as Dundalk, Essex, Catonsville, and Cherry Hill. I would like to share my passion for traveling with someone else.
On our date we can discuss many interesting topics such as how my uncles would take pictures of me in the shower. Please don't be a big talker, I like to talk about myself so try and stay quiet. Bringing random pills on the date is a huge plus but Oxycontin clogs me up. You are probably already excited to wink at me by now but I will continue. I am sort of old fashioned, so I don't go past third base on the first date. Also, there is a person with the same name, height, weight, and oddly the same picture as me on the Maryland Sex Offender Registry. I swear it wasn't me. I would never do that to a crocodile; I like farm animals. Interesting fact: Last week I made a tower out of legos. I also have terrible acne. Nothing brings a bigger smile to my face then when kids find out there isn't a Santa. I ask my friends that are parents to invite me over for that event.
Be forewarned that I am a doomsday prepper. I just started yesterday by buying 35 gallons of milk. I guess I didn't think it through because although I can quench the thirst of about 50 people, it would only be for about one week and it has to be used in this next week.
I just got out of a five year relationship. If you are wondering why, it was court ordered. I beat her but it was her fault. She always forgot to raise her hand before she spoke and sometimes she would wear obscene outfits where everyone could see her ankles...what a slut. So, after we "broke up", I followed her around for a while until she was unappreciative enough to file for a restraining order....lucky number 17. Email me with further questions.

Here are some testimonials from previous dates:

"He took me to Red Lobster...classy" -Sally

"He said he was going to have a party for me but later said, "Surprise! I'm not having a party for you." I told him a surprise party doesn't work like that but you gotta give him credit for the effort." -Frieda

"I saw him put something in my drink and I didn't remember one thing until the next morning but he told me I had a great time!" -Helga

"I was so happy when my parents signed the consent form. We had so much fun that the next day I was too hungover and missed the school bus." -Jen

"I didn't tell him I was a man until the next morning and he wasn't mad or anything....he even made me breakfast!" -Rick

"He gave me AIDS and now I can have sex with any other AIDS patient and not have to wear protection, Thanks Dave!" -Cindy

"I'm a plus sized woman and I didn't think love-making was possible but given Dave's prior experience with the big girls, he was really able to pull it off" -Jean

"It was funny when he was making farting sounds with his arm pits to the tune of 'hear comes the bride' but my sister said it ruined the ceremony." -Rosie

"He said we couldn't date until I converted to Judaism. After I did he told me that he was Catholic and just wanted to date a jewish person to piss off this Grandmother" -Helen

Interests:
Alumni connections, Dining out, Movies/Videos, Music and concerts, Playing sports, Travel/Sightseeing, Watching sports
Sports & exercise:
Baseball, Basketball, Bowling, Football, Golf, Running, Tennis / Racquet sports, Weights / Machines, Yoga
Exercise habits:
I exercise 3-4 times per week
Pets:
Pet Essay:

I had a yellow lab, Haley, but she passed about 2 years ago.

Political views:
I'll tell you later
Sign:
Taurus
College:
Indiana University of Pennsylvania, Indiana, PA
For fun:

Snowboarding, golf, surf when I can, play any sport, Ravens, be with friends and family, go out, read, drink, climbing, tennis, Atlantic City, watch all types of movies, unsolicited psychological research.

Favorite hot spots:

Bars: Federal Hill, Canton, Towson, Timonium (York Rd.).

Best places I've been: Key West, Cancun, Jamaica, Cabo, Bahamas, Ontario, all over US, I usually go to places on the coast of California. I hopefully will have time to go to Europe soon.

Favorite things:

The color blue, sushi, wings, vegan food, books about social interactions, lots of water, I love eastbound and down, modern family, tosh.0, entourage, dexter, the office, wu-tang, collective soul, live, masta ace, the sting, and white men cant jump

Last read:

I've read so many books this year. I've also probably read 50 psychological case studies in the last month. I also read the Monitor and the psychological journal from the APA.

ABOUT... HIM HIS DATE
APPEARANCE:
Height:
5'9" (175cms)
5'3" (160cms) to 5'9" (175cms)
Body type:
About average
Slender, About average, Athletic and toned
Eyes:
Blue
No preference
Hair:
Light brown
No preference
   
LIFESTYLE:
Smoke:
No Way
No preference
Drink:
Moderately
Social Drinker, Regularly
Occupation:
Sales / Marketing
No preference
Income:
I'll tell you later
No preference
Relationship:
Never Married
No preference
Have kids:
No
No answer
Want kids:
Definitely
Definitely
   
BACKGROUND/VALUES:
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
No preference

Italian and Irish

Faith:
Christian / Catholic
No preference

Jesus only walked on water to impress girls. Jk... I'll probably go back to church again when I have a family.

Languages:
English, Italian
No preference
Education:
Graduate degree
Bachelors degree, Graduate degree, PhD / Post Doctoral

I have my Masters in Industrial Organizational Psychology from University of Baltimore. I have a Bachelors in Psychology from Towson University but also went to IUP. I am putting getting my Ph.D. on hold.

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