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Rev Up Your love Life With These Tips!

mysteryman5001

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Active within 2 weeks

45 year old man
Houston, Texas, United States

Seeking:
women 31-50
Within:
100 Miles of Splendora, Texas, United States
Relationship:
Divorced
Have kids:
Yes, they live away from home (1)
Want kids:
No
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
Body type:
About average
Height:
5'11" (180cms)
Faith:
Agnostic
Smoke:
No Way
Drink:
Social Drinker

 

ABOUT HIM & WHO HE'S LOOKING FOR

And I have a great sense of humor.
I hear you ladies are bombarded by men on here. Sorry not me. I wrote so many unanswered emails my pinky fell off.. I pinky swear. It will take your effort. So if your feeling spunky you should hit "message"..Right now... wait before you do...
Reasons not to contact me.man this is getting longer.
1. you are hiding behind something in your photos. peekaboo!
2. there is more dog pics in your profile than you.
3. a pic of a 20yr old pic. strange.
4. your profile says "live love laugh", really who doesn't want that. Cliche.
5. your profile is a dream of an idea of a perfect man....that does not exist. And even though u email him u have no intetion of meeting him.
6. you think you have a sense of humor, but really don't. sorry.
7. If you dont have a pic...why this is 2014, really.
8. U email me expect me to respond...but u hid you profile...rude.

If you are totally disgusted by my previous statements read no further...I bid you adieu you take yourself to serious. I wish you luck. And one word of advice. DONT MAKE THE KISSY FACE.fyi.

ok anybody that made it this far. Now the fun stuff.
I am literate and I have all my teeth..mostly. My skin is pretty good, and I have nice hair. I like to smell good even when I am sweating. I Don't cook..why? you ask " a man who can cook is sexy" Bologna.. I literally blew up a pot of mac and cheese once. Not sure how sexy a kitchen fire is, but it will definetly be memorable. I've never given anyone food poisoning...intentionally ;) I hate raw chicken and mayo, gag. Speed is awesome... I like the adrenaline. I can do a stoppie on my dirt bike. I have knocked myself out a few times. I am just sayin so if you meet me and think wth is wrong with that guy you will know....but not really :)
I have mysterious side when I first meet someone. Soon after the ambiance goes away the you will just want me to shut up. lol I consider myself a civilized REDNECK, if there is such a thing :)
But I love to make people laugh. Once I know you, I am sure I can make you laugh so hard one of 3 things will happen. Either you will,
A. laugh so hard you cry
B. you Pee yourself
C. Shoot some liquid out of your nose
Any will be considered an adequate response. Fyi, that is very hard to do on here voice inflection is kinda challenging.
I have a very polarizing personality. I will tell you the truth whether you like it or not. But more than likely It just needs "more cow bell" " I love cow bell" If you dont get it google it. Because everthing on the internet is true. If you dont laugh..your dead or something. I don't apologize for who I am. I may have a rough exterior, but there is more than meets the eye. You just gotta want to see inside.
I literally dont see age. Couldnt careless, I just care if Im attracted to you, which is a whole other topic, not for here.lol If you have read this far I commend you for not falling asleep at the key board. but if you did, wipe that stuff up and hit reply.
ok the serious stuff....tick tok tick tok tick hmmm I got nothing.
My motto live life and be happy happy happy....if life gives you lemons cut them up and put them on a corona or throw them in the blender.
Thanks for hanging out with me for a minute I hope you had a laugh.
P.s. remember the next time you see a guy doing something "redneckish", just know that could be me :):):)....and you maybe.

Interests:
Camping, Exploring new areas, Playing sports, Travel/Sightseeing, Video games, Wine tasting
Sports & exercise:
Auto racing / Motorcross, Golf, Martial arts, Swimming, Weights / Machines
Exercise habits:
I exercise 1-2 times per week
Pets:
I'll tell you later
Pet Essay:

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Political views:
Conservative
Sign:
Scorpio
College:
Utah State University, Logan, UT
For fun:

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Favorite hot spots:

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Favorite things:

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Last read:

My quote of the day:
You know that little tingly feeling you get when you like somebody?
that's your common sense leaving your body.

Ride it like you stole it!

ABOUT... HIM HIS DATE
APPEARANCE:
Height:
5'11" (180cms)
3'0" (91cms) to 5'5" (165cms)
Body type:
About average
Slender, Athletic and toned
Eyes:
Brown
No preference
Hair:
Light brown
No preference
   
LIFESTYLE:
Smoke:
No Way
No preference
Drink:
Social Drinker
Social Drinker
Occupation:
Administrative / Secretarial
No preference

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Income:
$150,001+
$50,001 to $75,000, $75,001 to $100,000, $100,001 to $150,000, $150,001+
Relationship:
Divorced
No preference
Have kids:
Yes, they live away from home (1)
No answer
Want kids:
No
No, but it's OK if my partner has kids
   
BACKGROUND/VALUES:
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
No preference

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Faith:
Agnostic
No preference
Languages:
English
No preference
Education:
Bachelors degree
No preference

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