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mattingleymatt

"I'd take a life of raw emotion, than a life content 'til death"

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Active within 2 weeks

41 year old man
Austin, Texas, United States

Seeking:
women 33-43
Within:
10 Miles of Austin, Texas, United States
Relationship:
Divorced
Have kids:
No
Want kids:
Not sure
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
Body type:
Athletic and toned
Height:
5'10" (177cms)
Faith:
Other
Smoke:
No Way
Drink:
Social Drinker

 

ABOUT HIM & WHO HE'S LOOKING FOR

I’ve learned that:
You don’t get to choose who you love, and you don’t get to choose who loves you.
You can’t make anyone else happy if you aren’t first happy yourself.
The person that you’re in a relationship with probably would like to feel wanted, appreciated, loved, and connected.
A realistic relationship needs mutual emotional, intellectual, and physical attraction that will ideally result in deep emotional intimacy and fantastic sexual chemistry.
I know what I want, I know what I am looking for (although I can't seem to define it), and I know that I can’t simply make that happen with someone- it has to happen naturally.
The 'right' relationship is easy- it's natural and everything just works without much effort, partially because you want to do things to make the other person's life better and easier, while remembering to not become someone different from the person they were initially attracted to.
I find attractive a woman that knows who she is and is happy/comfortable with what life experience has taught her about herself.
I've learned a few other things, too… ;o)
(Yep, I used an emoticon! Is that a deal breaker??)

And here’s some more not-too-specific stuff about me-
I love to be outside, but I’m not an adrenaline junkie. I exercise regularly, but I make up for it by eating pretty bad. I’ve lived in a few exotic places, but I haven’t traveled all that much. I sacrificed my marriage (to a wonderful person) to go back to school- and I should have done both of those things sooner than I did. I truly love my job and couldn’t imagine doing anything else, but it doesn’t define who I am.


UPDATE (revised)- Now, for THE FINE PRINT:
I think meeting on Match is very unnatural... I think I do much better slowly getting to know someone in a recurring social or work situation, but, I guess we're all on Match because that stuff isn't working out!
I've met a few wonderful people here, but it just didn't go anywhere- either because they weren't "the one", or, (more likely) because I am damaged and haven't been able to feel any real emotion for anyone for a few years. (I bet you can't wait to contact me!)

So, I'm learning that what I'm realistically looking for is someone that I genuinely like spending time with, that wants to be in a monogamous social and physical relationship, but has no expectations of the relationship developing into anything too serious after only a few dates... I say that because I think it takes at least a few dates to know if they COULD be "the one". Granted, sometimes you know that they're NOT the one after one meeting (or 2 minutes into that first meeting!). I think that if we see each other 3-4 times then it means that we are obviously interested in each other, but it doesn't necessarily mean that we are on our way to living happily-ever-after... But, I think if it's been 3-4 MONTHS then we can assume that we are giving it a real chance to see where it goes. I'm not sure that I believe in love at first sight anymore- I haven't felt that for many years... But, I DO want to be in a happily-ever-after relationship, I just think it takes time for that to happen. As I said earlier- it shouldn't be difficult and you shouldn't have to MAKE it happen, I think it will happen naturally with the right person as you find out more about each other and spend more time together.
I think if I can find that person, then Murphy's Law or irony or Karma will make sure that I fall in love and get hurt when they don't fall in love! :-)

One more thing- I really don't like saying this out loud, and I wish it weren't true, but I'm aiming for brutal honesty today- so, here goes...
I've said (and I believe) that you don't get to choose who you love, however, I have learned that if I don't find her physically attractive then I won't really give her a chance. So, I hope she'll be fit and athletic and smaller than me!...

Interests:
Dining out, Movies/Videos, Music and concerts, Playing sports, Travel/Sightseeing
Sports & exercise:
Aerobics, Cycling, Running, Skiing, Soccer, Swimming, Tennis / Racquet sports, Walking / Hiking, Weights / Machines, Other types of exercise
Exercise habits:
I exercise 5 or more times per week
Pets:
I have Dogs
Pet Essay:

Well, I'm kinda between dogs right now :-(

Political views:
Middle of the Road
Sign:
Libra
College:
Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University, Blacksburg, VA
For fun:

Just about anything that involves the sun shining on my back and shoulders! Running, biking, being outside! On a boat, on a beach, on a mountain with a view, working outside, live music, drinks on a patio, smiling...

Favorite hot spots:

You might find me doing a lap around Town Lake, or putting in some long miles around Lake Travis on the bicycle, or later in the day maybe sitting with a beer and friends someplace cool like Shady Grove!... But, I need to find a better place!

Favorite things:

The sun on my back! I love to hike or run in the woods. I love long bicycle rides. I love to run in the sun or on a trail. I love the drive through the countryside that takes me to a hiking or biking spot. Oh- extremely fond of my dog, too!

Last read:

Born to Run has really changed my running ability and enjoyability! I've read a few Paleo diet books- I believe the Paleo diet could solve any and all of my fitness shortcomings, but I'm not sure if my recent diet improvments will go quite that far!

ABOUT... HIM HIS DATE
APPEARANCE:
Height:
5'10" (177cms)
5'4" (162cms) to 5'7" (170cms)
Body type:
Athletic and toned
Slender, About average, Athletic and toned
Eyes:
Hazel
No preference
Hair:
Dark blonde
No preference
   
LIFESTYLE:
Smoke:
No Way
No Way
Drink:
Social Drinker
Social Drinker, Moderately
Occupation:
Medical / Dental / Veterinary / Fitness
No preference

I love my job! I get to solve problems, help animals, help people, and I learn something new daily!

Income:
$75,001 to $100,000
No preference
Relationship:
Divorced
Divorced
Have kids:
No
No, Yes, and they live away from home
Want kids:
Not sure
No preference
   
BACKGROUND/VALUES:
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
White / Caucasian

Simple southern white-boy, but the red(neck) has worn off as I've gotten to be a little more cultured! I used to be cut-off's and t-shirts, but now I'm a button-up with jeans or shorts usually... Well, at least no more cut-off's!

Faith:
Other
No preference

I grew up going to a Christian/Southern Baptist church with my grandparents. I like the idea of Christian values, and I try to generally be a good person, but I do not believe in the God that my grandparents believed in.

Languages:
English
No preference
Education:
Graduate degree
Some college, Associates degree, Bachelors degree, Graduate degree, PhD / Post Doctoral

I went back to school later in life, so I didn't have the same experience in undergrad that most had. However, my graduate school experience was pretty sweet!

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