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dougdart_11

Ex-Chip'n'Dale dancer (See picture*) Seeking...

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48 year old man
Johns Creek, Georgia, United States

Seeking:
women 18-121
Within:
20 Miles of Alpharetta, Georgia, United States
Relationship:
Divorced
Have kids:
Yes, they sometimes live at home (1)
Want kids:
Someday
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
Body type:
Athletic and toned
Height:
5'11" (180cms)
Faith:
Christian / Protestant
Smoke:
No Way
Drink:
Social Drinker

 

ABOUT HIM & WHO HE'S LOOKING FOR

Ex-Chip'n'Dale dancer (See picture*) Seeking his Victoria Secret Model!

* No picture, Actually they would not approve the picture since it was a pic of Chip and Dale, Disney Chipmunk characters.)

About me: I am a fun, active, attractive, (look and act easily 15 years younger. (If you are lucky you can even see me act like a 15 year old occasionally! ;) ) affectionate, loyal, honest and loving guy looking for someone cute, fun, positive on life, not into drama, sincere, loyal, loving and affectionate.
Someone who enjoys doing all kinds of things from hiking, movies, dining out, playing sports or just exploring...
Someone who plays tennis or would like to learn not required but would be nice! :)! I generally date fairly younger.

I have a great sense of humor. If you do NOT like "Michael Scott", "Larry David", Tucker Max(Author), Daniel Tosh and Andrew 'Dice" Clay then YOU WILL Probably NOT LIKE ME, YOU WILL Probably NOT BE ABLE TO HANDLE ME as my personality is a combination of theirs! ;) (Just ask any girl who has met me on here! ;) They will tell you... that I am just a funny teddy bear. (Just not as chubby as a Teddy Bear)

I never expected online dating to be worse than being married! ;) But I have had to create some deal breakers: (btw I know that being a girl on here is probably worse than what I go through... I am not women bashing!)

Deal Breakers: (I ONLY DATE WOMEN or at least men who look like women, I think there is a different website for that!)

#1. People who claim not to be smokers but only take an occasional breath of non-cigarette smoke! Next to lying about body type, 2nd biggest lie! "I only smoke when I drink" Then I guess you drink at every meal and all day and night!
#2. No Picture.... or 1 picture =Scam usually, 10 year old pictures... REALLY? And vacation pictures without you in them?
#3:Crazy, flaky, emotionally unstable and unavailable, alcoholics, liars and time wasters and narcissists. (50% on here.)
#4. If you drink one bottle of wine each weekday night and two on each weekend night we are not a match. (If you drink more than that we are also not a match! Get some help!)
#5. Gold diggers unless you want to help me find gold! (Have you seen the show "Gold Rush"?
#6. Could someone explain what Slender, Athletic and Average mean...? I am not sure that most people on here understand the definitions... I am not a mean person... but Slender is not 25lbs overweight... and athletic is not 50lbs overweight... and I won't even address what people count as average! If you have "Rolls" you are not athletic or average! (By the way you don't need to look like a Barbie doll so don't read into this deal breaker.)
#7. While I am on a roll: Time wasters, indecisive women, texting for weeks on end and never meeting? numerous phone calls and you keep delaying meeting. And you want phone sex? Please waste someone else's time.
#8. If you say you are going to do something do it.... texting 10 minutes before meeting that your dog has diarrhea. Is BS. Oh I mean DS.
#9. If you are one of the many fake profiles that send me the same email everyday saying contact me via email
#10. I need to take my medicine.
#11. I am purchasing an electric car, so you will need to live within 30 miles of me, otherwise I may not make it home from your place. I like to sleep in my own bed with my stuffed animals each night. They would miss me.
#12. Obviously the medicine has not kicked in yet...
#13 INCOME: if your profile says your date has to have income of $150,000 and you don't earn 150k. (See #5 above)
So do you know what "Satire" is? You just read it!

MEET ME AND DATE GUARANTEE: I guarantee if you meet me you will love me and think I am totally a great guy. Otherwise Match will give you your money back! ;) Not!
Don't be scared, take a chance for once! "I'm ready for love" by Bad Company. I truly am... could you be the one?

Interests:
Coffee and conversation, Cooking, Dining out, Gardening/Landscaping, Movies/Videos, Museums and art, Music and concerts, Exploring new areas, Playing sports, Shopping/Antiques, Travel/Sightseeing
Sports & exercise:
Cycling, Running, Tennis / Racquet sports, Walking / Hiking, Weights / Machines, Hockey
Exercise habits:
I exercise 5 or more times per week
Pets:
I have Cats, Dogs
Pet Essay:

Teddy aka Shitty the rescue CHUG! Maybe not a CHUG... will do a dna text and find out (Long story on this one...) Actually the cat died! :( Somehow the lizard is still alive!)

Political views:
Conservative
Sign:
Sagittarius
College:
I'll tell you later
For fun:

Live music, Live Comedy, Festivals, Neuter Dinosaurs... Just seeing if you are reading this... Dining out, outdoor activities, hiking, playing tennis, going to the movies or watching one at home. Doing things with my children. (Home improvements etc

Favorite hot spots:

Atlanta metro has so many great restaurants... I can dine at the Waffle House or to any great ATL restaurant. Fat Matts, Tin Lizzy. Dessert at Cafe Intermezzo.

Favorite things:

Love live Music.... mostly alternative and ALT/Pop. The Tabernacle... The Masquerade... Verizon Wireless Amphitheater. Eddies New Attic in Duluth. JC 37 Main, Everything from Jazz, Big Band to Alternative/Punk/Ska and everything in-between!

Last read:

My Friend the Mercenary, Steve Jobs Bio. (Incredible book.) 50 Shades of Grey, Only through the 4nd chapter, so if you want SM I don't know it yet! ;)

ABOUT... HIM HIS DATE
APPEARANCE:
Height:
5'11" (180cms)
3'5" (104cms) to 6'2" (187cms)
Body type:
Athletic and toned
Slender, About average, Athletic and toned
Eyes:
Blue
No preference
Hair:
Blonde
Auburn / Red, Light brown, Dark brown, Blonde, Dark blonde, Bald
   
LIFESTYLE:
Smoke:
No Way
No Way
Drink:
Social Drinker
Social Drinker
Occupation:
Artistic / Creative / Performance
No preference

Comedian Circus performer in training! Ok I was told that some girls have not responded to me because they thought I was really in the circus! It's just a joke. I have a real job! Happy now! ;)

Income:
I'll tell you later
No preference
Relationship:
Divorced
Never Married, Widow / Widower, Divorced
Have kids:
Yes, they sometimes live at home (1)
No answer
Want kids:
Someday
Someday, Not sure, Probably not, No, No, but it's OK if my partner has kids
   
BACKGROUND/VALUES:
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
White / Caucasian

100% Born American! (For the people offended) All I am saying is that I don't say I am "Irish American", "Scot American" or "German American" or "White American" for that matter. I am also straight but don't hold up a sign saying that either!

Faith:
Christian / Protestant
Christian / Catholic, Christian / Protestant, Christian / Other

I have strong beliefs, but do not push them on others or judge others. (Well I sometimes judge others... I like being the judge and don't like to be in front of a judge).

Languages:
English
English
Education:
Bachelors degree
Bachelors degree, Graduate degree, PhD / Post Doctoral

Well educated! Thank goodness for mail order diploma mills...

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