A friend actually wrote one for me in jest, but it's about 60% true:
A badass, blood sports loving, scotch swilling, steak chomping, only slightly gay woman who loves origami, the USC Trojans and, ironically, chick flicks and mathematics. She is looking for a man who fits the same description and who is tolerant of her bodily functions and thinks sweat pants are appropriate for all occasions.
...I like to surround myself with people who have a sense of humor and appreciate my quirkiness. I am very very very hard working and am trying to balance out my life. Friends and non-friends think I'm adorkable.