There will be a quiz at the end of this post.
I suppose I will start with the basic stuff I enjoy tennis, volleyball, biking and hiking; yoga; weird museums (best: Mushroom Institute in Philly, where I used to live); going for drives and finding something interesting along the way; running with scissors.
Mostly, I like finding unusual and fun stuff to do about Los Angeles. My favorite thing at the moment is the old movies that screen outdoors at the Hollywood Cemetery - you can bring a picnic and bottle of wine, a la the Hollywood Bowl.
I write for a living. Books, scripts, magazine articles, corporate gigs. Everything but limericks is my motto.
My basic philosophy is the Dalai Lama, mixed with Thoreau, with a few dashes of Emerson, Ann Rice and Sarte.
Now is the above sentence pretentious or what? Does anybody even know what it means? I don't! But that's what LA has done to me. I've become a pretentious a-hole! I deserve the traffic and the Starbucks.
As you can see I am procrastinating now. I should be writing. Well, of course, I am writing this. But that's not real writing.
OK, now the quiz. I have written sex quizzes for Cosmo(really!) so this is right up my alley:
1. What do you hate most about LA?
2. What do you like most about LA? (extra points if 1 and 2 are the same thing!)
3. Are exclamation points cool or annoying!!!!!!!!!!!!!?????????????
4. Do you have all your own teeth, and, if so, do you know where they are?
5. If you could invite anyone to dinner who would it be?
Now a story: yesterday, I go to Griffith Park and hike up to Mount Hollywood, which is just above the Hollywood sign. Now, understand, the trail goes behind the sign, and there is a chain link fence with all these signs saying you can not trespass and go up to the sign. It’s about 30 feet away from the fence. As I am coming back down, I see this Australian couple, leaning into the fence.
She: I thought we’d be able to be closer.
He: I thought we’d be able to touch it.
Just as he said this I was one foot away and said: “I’ve touched it.”
They both wield around.
He: “But there’s a fence. And signs that say it’s trespassing.”
Me: “I’m not saying it’s legal. I’m just saying I’ve done it … Enjoy America.”
And I went back down the path. Five minutes later, a police car comes roaring up the path.
Ten minutes later I hear a bullhorn: “Get off the hill. You are subject to arrest. There are signs telling you this is trespassing. Get off the hill. You are subject to arrest"
