I have a dry, sarcastic sense of humor that is not for the feint of heart. A couple additional useful tidbits of information about me.....
-I am a lover, not a fighter, but I am also a fighter, so don't get any ideas.
-When I order a salad, I get the dressing right there on top of the salad, where it belongs...where there is no turning back.
-I don't believe in using oven mitts, nor potholders.
-My pillow talk is years ahead of it's time
-My sweat smells like cologne.
-The pheromones I secrete effect people miles away...in a slight, but measurable way.
-My legend precedes me like the way lightning precedes thunder.
-Most importantly.....I bowl.....Overhand!
Additional important information about me......
-For one, I cannot be trusted. I abhor sarcasm/irony and bitterly despise honesty and integrity.
-'Having fun' is painfully overrated -- even loathsome -- to me and character traits such as thoughtfulness and genuineness are simply repellent.
-Monogamy is, quite obviously, counter-productive to a committed relationship and sex is boring, unless done quickly and mechanically and without passion or emotion.
-Anyone who is interested in me should be physically hideous and vacuous of mind. She should display a certain lack of humor and dislike affection of any kind, particularly kissing
Just to reiterate, the woman I am currently looking for should be the complete reverse of everything I just noted.
Ultimately, I am looking for an independent woman who is SMART, DRIVEN, silly, and attractive. I consider myself to be someone who is kind, open minded, passionate, fun & spontaneous. I need a woman who can keep up with my wit and sense of humor. Essentially, I want someone who can challenge me. I enjoy being around people with the right attitude and an open-mindedness for fun and adventure. If you are still in your bad-boy-musician phase or can't seem to kick your unquenchable attraction to emotionally unavailable men, we will probably not be a good match.