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Rev Up Your love Life With These Tips!

Kelly_Kristine

I much perfer beautiful chaos to ugly perfection.

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Active within 24 hours

31 year old woman
Kingsport, Tennessee, United States

Seeking:
men 30-38
Within:
50 Miles of Kingsport, Tennessee, United States
Relationship:
Never Married
Have kids:
No
Want kids:
Definitely
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
Body type:
A few extra pounds
Height:
5'6" (167cms)
Faith:
I'll tell you later
Smoke:
No Way
Drink:
Social Drinker

 

ABOUT HER & WHO SHE'S LOOKING FOR

One morning I crawled out of bed, went into the kitchen for a cup of coffee, and that’s when I saw it. Sitting comfortably in my sink was a big fat harry spider. I know what you’re thinking – “Oh geez Kelly, it’s just a spider. Surely you’ve seen spiders before.” You are correct dear reader, I have seen spiders before….but not like this. This is a spider that eats cute little kittens for breakfast. Just hanging out in my sink. I FREAKED. What the hell am I suppose to do about this??? I must kill this creature. I usually kill spiders with a wadded up paper towel, but that wouldn’t work, because I’d have to get close to the beast, and it might bite my arm off. So looking around the house I found a long stick, which had its possibilities, I could squish it from a distance, but what if I missed and just managed to piss him off? I continued my weapon search, and found an insect killing spray. The two things I loved about this option are 1)”Kill’s instantly on contact” 2) “Sprays up to 20 feet away.” This is perfect! I’m so brave that I don’t need to be 20 feet away…6 or 7 feet will do. I stood back, took aim, and sprayed. The instant the poison hit its target, the big harry creature exploded and a hundred little spiders suddenly materialized out of its ass and were running in all directions! What the Hell! There was some bizarre sci-fi horror movie taking place in my sink! I continued to spray, hitting the entire army, until I was convinced without a doubt that they were all dead, only then would I get close enough to turn on the faucet and wash away the bodies. The point to this story, and I do have one, is that I'm looking for a man brave enough to kill spiders for me! If you can do that, you are my knight in shining armor.

Interests:
Book club, Coffee and conversation, Cooking, Dining out, Hobbies and crafts, Museums and art, Music and concerts, Playing cards
Sports & exercise:
Swimming, Walking / Hiking, Other types of exercise
Exercise habits:
I'll tell you later
Pets:
Pet Essay:

I love animals! I recently moved here, but as soon as I'm settled I'd love to find a pet.

Political views:
Middle of the Road
Sign:
Aries
College:
I'll tell you later
For fun:

I read a lot - a little bit of everything, biographies, comedy, nature, literature. I love art - one of my hobbies is painting. I also enjoy the outdoors - horseback riding or swimming in a lake.

Favorite things:

I like coffee in the morning and wine at night. I like country love songs. I like Kurt Vonnegut novels.

Last read:

"Tell the Wolves I'm home" by Carol Rifka Brunt. But I read a lot so this answer is always changing.

ABOUT... HER HER DATE
APPEARANCE:
Height:
5'6" (167cms)
3'0" (91cms) to 8'11" (271cms)
Body type:
A few extra pounds
No preference
Eyes:
Brown
No preference
Hair:
Dark brown
No preference
   
LIFESTYLE:
Smoke:
No Way
No Way
Drink:
Social Drinker
Social Drinker
Occupation:
I'll tell you later
No preference
Income:
I'll tell you later
No preference
Relationship:
Never Married
No preference
Have kids:
No
No answer
Want kids:
Definitely
Definitely, Someday
   
BACKGROUND/VALUES:
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
No preference
Faith:
I'll tell you later
No preference
Languages:
English
English
Education:
Associates degree
No preference

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