There is a moment, maybe dozens of them in a lifetime, maybe just one, where you have to decide to organize your life around something, anything, in order to ground your life, to give it a place to depart from. These some things can change, sometimes they stay for the length of your days, sometimes you change them like shoes when they wear out. You can layer them, move between them, but always there is the primacy of one, one thing, one single thing and your life opens by the fact you have chosen, by the fact you have imposed an order on the chaos of your days, by saying, this child, this love, this eight and a half by eleven inch sheet of paper, this light, this work, this image, this story, this bowler hat, this box of ammunition, this pen knife, this cuff link, this song, this house, this memory, this business card, this phone book, this wooden mallet, this coffee cup, this chair, this stone, this drum, this boat, this dream, this dream, this dream, this beauty, this horror, this will to impose order on the chaos of my days is the doorway to a different life -
Choose. It is the first step.
Live by it until you know you are ready for the next thing, and then choose again.
You'll know your life is running under its own power when you use your power to choose and choose from the deepest well inside you. Choose and live. choose and live.
But unless you have chosen, unless you have already tasted the freedom of being bound by your choices, you do not believe it, you do not believe you can do it, you do not believe it is possible. You doubt your ability to choose from the multitude of possibilities in front of you. The critic in your head reminds you of the guitar lessons you gave up on, the marriage that dissolved, the jobs you've changed with the seasons. choosing is easy, committing to the choice is how you have your life. And there's this as well: you can walk into a flea market and find a jewlery box with tons of drawers be intrigued by the color of it, the message it has for you, and choose a different life. The key is to organize your life around that choice: each time. In time, over time, you'll find that thing that is you and then, then, then, then, then, then the residual of your hard work will appear to be luck to others who have not chosen anything, and because you surrendered to your choice your life will bloom in ways you cannot imagine.
