Second line to song "It started way back in history ... With Adrock, MCA and me, Mike D"
ME Me me:
I photographed fighter jets over the pyramids, raced mountain bikes in Oregon and was a bowling prodigy at age 10. Dogs like me / I like dogs. Laundry is my kryptonite and 1950's vintage decor is my spinach. The trash man comes too early and Seattle summer comes too late. I tend to overpack and love lima beans (until I found out I am allergic to them...aargh!). I want an al paca farm and a Victorian house with a secret poker/cigar room behind a bookcase. I can hit a curve ball, dressed up as Dracula for Halloween 3 years in a row and I paint...poorly. I prefer lists in bullet form and I'm inked.
My enemies would describe me as a useless waste of human flesh that feeds on the weak and torments the old. I have no enemies.
Seeking:
Overly tanned, makeup plastered, mammoplasty popping, short dress/high heal wearing, botox sporting stumbling woman. Spotted in packs of 2 to 6, has a keen sense of alcohol whereabouts and often found with a blinged iphone attached to the right earlobe. If spotted please take a pic and note location, time date. [From an Anthropological perspective I am fascinated with this breed of woman. Though I would never ever seriously date this breed of female, I would probably enjoy a date like I would enjoy a date with a 3 foot woman or an 8 foot 11inch woman] If you match the above qualities You can go about your business move along move along.
YOU YOU YOU:
The heroine I am searching for will be magical, tough, sarcastic, well-grounded, opinionated, creative and imaginative. I want to listen to your stories, adventures and sit on the porch recapping a few of our own. Are you funky, quirky, passionate and confident? I hope so. You are a happy traveller, bitchy loser and loves a cocktail now and then preferably now.
Hopefully, you are not too caught up in the materialistic things in life and would rather spend moola on adventures, experiences and new people (Our camera will provide the material memories). The little joys of life far outweigh the purchased things in life (unless it is a vinyl, killer vintage furniture piece or must-have artsy knick knack). Philanthropy is an important and rewarding part of life for me. I hope you feel the same way.
Still have time for a few more notes?
My home is Ballard. The Sunday market, plethora number of food options, great locally owned shops, Golden Gardens and Carkeek beaches, dive bars mixed with skilled bartending mixologists and I am so happy to be close to a good variety of live music. A much welcomed relief from the monotony of suburbia.
Places lived: Huntington Beach (Hometown); Denver; Mountain Home, Idaho; Newport Beach; Eugene; Boston
Fav Podcasts: The Moth, Stuff You Should Know, Adam Carolla, WTF, Freakonomics, Stuff you missed in History class, TED Talks, Risk!
Music: Ray Charles is the master and Jack White rocks the rock. I get funked up on Parliament and old Stevie Wonder, then chill to Marley and local country/folk. When feeling destructive, I listen to Rage Against the Machine, Korn or Milli Vanilli. Eddie Vedder-my homey. The Black Keys, Ting Tings, Beastie Boys (RIP MCA) and Patrick Sweaney can be followed by a dose of Dave Brubeck and 80's rap. Waylon Jennings, Loretta Lynn and the White Buffalo begin my morning hoedowns.
TV: Comcast has been avoided by streaming Netflix and Hulu to my big flat screen TV. I rock!
Can you answer these Five questions in an email to me? (10 points each)
1. What is in MY freezer?
2. Scientology is?
3. If I could have one super power it would be?
4. Humor is muy importante (very important). Please name your top three sitcoms?
5. My favorite body of water is?
6. This profile is?
a. The Best Ever!
b. Ridiculously Hilarious!
c. I'm in LOVE!
d. Majestic and God Like!
e. Idiotic Babble
