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Guava_Hero

"Now here's a little story I got to tell ... About three bad brothers you know so well." Name That TUNE! Read profile for next line

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Active within 2 weeks

43 year old man
Seattle, Washington, United States

Seeking:
women 28-44
Within:
10 Miles of Seattle, Washington, United States
Relationship:
Divorced
Have kids:
Yes, they live away from home (2)
Want kids:
Not sure
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
Body type:
About average
Height:
5'11" (180cms)
Faith:
Spiritual but not religious
Smoke:
No Way
Drink:
Social Drinker

 

ABOUT HIM & WHO HE'S LOOKING FOR

Second line to song "It started way back in history ... With Adrock, MCA and me, Mike D"

ME Me me:
I photographed fighter jets over the pyramids, raced mountain bikes in Oregon and was a bowling prodigy at age 10. Dogs like me / I like dogs. Laundry is my kryptonite and 1950's vintage decor is my spinach. The trash man comes too early and Seattle summer comes too late. I tend to overpack and love lima beans (until I found out I am allergic to them...aargh!). I want an al paca farm and a Victorian house with a secret poker/cigar room behind a bookcase. I can hit a curve ball, dressed up as Dracula for Halloween 3 years in a row and I paint...poorly. I prefer lists in bullet form and I'm inked.

My enemies would describe me as a useless waste of human flesh that feeds on the weak and torments the old. I have no enemies.

Seeking:
Overly tanned, makeup plastered, mammoplasty popping, short dress/high heal wearing, botox sporting stumbling woman. Spotted in packs of 2 to 6, has a keen sense of alcohol whereabouts and often found with a blinged iphone attached to the right earlobe. If spotted please take a pic and note location, time date. [From an Anthropological perspective I am fascinated with this breed of woman. Though I would never ever seriously date this breed of female, I would probably enjoy a date like I would enjoy a date with a 3 foot woman or an 8 foot 11inch woman] If you match the above qualities You can go about your business move along move along.

YOU YOU YOU:
The heroine I am searching for will be magical, tough, sarcastic, well-grounded, opinionated, creative and imaginative. I want to listen to your stories, adventures and sit on the porch recapping a few of our own. Are you funky, quirky, passionate and confident? I hope so. You are a happy traveller, bitchy loser and loves a cocktail now and then preferably now.

Hopefully, you are not too caught up in the materialistic things in life and would rather spend moola on adventures, experiences and new people (Our camera will provide the material memories). The little joys of life far outweigh the purchased things in life (unless it is a vinyl, killer vintage furniture piece or must-have artsy knick knack). Philanthropy is an important and rewarding part of life for me. I hope you feel the same way.

Still have time for a few more notes?

My home is Ballard. The Sunday market, plethora number of food options, great locally owned shops, Golden Gardens and Carkeek beaches, dive bars mixed with skilled bartending mixologists and I am so happy to be close to a good variety of live music. A much welcomed relief from the monotony of suburbia.

Places lived: Huntington Beach (Hometown); Denver; Mountain Home, Idaho; Newport Beach; Eugene; Boston

Fav Podcasts: The Moth, Stuff You Should Know, Adam Carolla, WTF, Freakonomics, Stuff you missed in History class, TED Talks, Risk!

Music: Ray Charles is the master and Jack White rocks the rock. I get funked up on Parliament and old Stevie Wonder, then chill to Marley and local country/folk. When feeling destructive, I listen to Rage Against the Machine, Korn or Milli Vanilli. Eddie Vedder-my homey. The Black Keys, Ting Tings, Beastie Boys (RIP MCA) and Patrick Sweaney can be followed by a dose of Dave Brubeck and 80's rap. Waylon Jennings, Loretta Lynn and the White Buffalo begin my morning hoedowns.

TV: Comcast has been avoided by streaming Netflix and Hulu to my big flat screen TV. I rock!

Can you answer these Five questions in an email to me? (10 points each)

1. What is in MY freezer?

2. Scientology is?

3. If I could have one super power it would be?

4. Humor is muy importante (very important). Please name your top three sitcoms?

5. My favorite body of water is?

6. This profile is?
a. The Best Ever!
b. Ridiculously Hilarious!
c. I'm in LOVE!
d. Majestic and God Like!
e. Idiotic Babble

Interests:
Camping, Cooking, Dining out, Fishing/Hunting, Gardening/Landscaping, Hobbies and crafts, Museums and art, Music and concerts, Exploring new areas, Performing arts, Playing sports, Shopping/Antiques, Travel/Sightseeing, Volunteering, Watching sports, Wine tasting
Sports & exercise:
Baseball, Bowling, Football, Golf, Skiing, Soccer, Walking / Hiking, Yoga, Other types of exercise
Exercise habits:
I exercise 1-2 times per week
Pets:
I have Fish, Other
Pet Essay:

I have/had two cats (Merle and Daisy) that live with my two little girls...miss those bastards.
Dogs are awesome and I have 4 canine nieces and nephews
My girls convinced me to buy a hamster...after 11 months, it died.

Political views:
Middle of the Road
Sign:
Don't display my sign
College:
University of Oregon, Eugene, OR
For fun:

Delivering sarcasm
Record Buying
Dream; Ponder
Baseball
BBQ
Travel and explore
Finding out what is going on today/tonight/15 minutes from now
Leaving the house with no plans
Laughing at stupid shiznit I get myself into

Favorite hot spots:

The Sun
Campfires
Downtown Ballard
Boca Del Toro - Panama
London
Boston
Any coastline
My red chair, with coffee on the weekend, sun shining through the window and Coltrane playing on my spinner.

Favorite things:

Watching my girls grow and being their superhero (I hope)
Baseball with buds
Music
People and their passion
Storytelling

Last read:

Nightstand reads:Sex, Drugs, Cocopuffs; The Tipping Point - Malcolm Gladwell; Change By Design - Tim Brown (Ideo); 101 Albums That Changed Popular Music; Why a Daughter Needs a Dad; something Sedaris; thousands of Match profiles.

ABOUT... HIM HIS DATE
APPEARANCE:
Height:
5'11" (180cms)
3'0" (91cms) to 8'11" (271cms)
Body type:
About average
Slender, About average, Curvy, Athletic and toned
Eyes:
Brown
No preference
Hair:
Dark brown
No preference
   
LIFESTYLE:
Smoke:
No Way
No Way, Occasionally
Drink:
Social Drinker
Social Drinker, Regularly, Moderately
Occupation:
Sales / Marketing
No preference

Much more on the marketing side...love to create.

Income:
I'll tell you later
No preference
Relationship:
Divorced
No preference
Have kids:
Yes, they live away from home (2)
No answer
Want kids:
Not sure
No preference
   
BACKGROUND/VALUES:
Ethnicity:
White / Caucasian
No preference

Irish/English. Grandma says she is 1/8th Mexican, but that does not qualify for any minority benefits. However, I do really like Mexican food.

Faith:
Spiritual but not religious
No preference

Sometimes agnostic and sometimes atheist. I have often colored Jesus pictures my little girls bring home from Sunday school. I read the entire bible...old testament. From an Anthropological perspective it was fascinating, but mostly fiction.

Languages:
English
English
Education:
Bachelors degree
Some college

Cultural Anthropology. Minor in primatology. Monkeys have tails and apes do not. Ok, ok, ok, not a minor, but had a few great primate classes and loved them. Jane Goodall performs a great (slightly scary) chimp call in person.

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