Stop window-shopping! You've been looking at profiles for over an hour now and feel like you're about to slip into a coma. Wake up! You're about to see the light.
Anyway, my bathroom is richly adorned with marble and my fridge fully stocked with cranberry juice and yogurt culture. What, did you think I was just another guy with beer, condiments and frozen pizza in his fridge?? Just bring over a good bottle of wine and your finest pair of party pants.
So, I like to go out occasionally, but not past the front yard or my ankle bracelet will alert the authorities. I live at the beach, play in the city, travel to far away places, eat GREAT food, go to live sporting events, hang out with A-list international super-celebrities, read long, smart, hard to understand books that make me more intelligent than everyone else I meet. I love deep intellectual conversations with myself but my greatest passion is to party. Not the kind of partying that you and your big-eared friends are used to. I'm talking serious Party Time!
So, who compliments me? You, if you’re attractive, charismatic, intelligent, fun, and have remarkably low standards. You're sweet and intelligent with a wild side. You have a high tolerance for grain alcohol and criticism. You're open to new experiences, strange experiences and you are great at keeping secrets... from the law. Certainly anybody like that is worth getting to know.
Now, I have to warn you. The guy above me is lying about his height and the guy below me is married. So, stop reading and start writing. Let's get to know each other.