Tickets to a show she wants to see, a love song sung soft and close, eye contact that lingers far longer than necessary, the words"I love you" when both partners agree: Romance can be fun. Romance can be thrilling. Sometimes it can just be comfortable and reassuring. Being in a good relationship is so wonderful. I miss it.
Not that my life now is so bad. I have many reasons to smile. I live in a beautiful city. The ocean is close. My parents live nearby and are in good health. My job is fulfilling and intellectually stimulating. It's close enough that I usually commute by bike. I have many positive co workers whom I respect. I've travelled quite a bit and have many great memories. My dog has matured into a great companion. The car's paid off. I just refinanced to a really low mortgage rate. I'm a really good parallel parker. The Clippers are finally better than the Lakers. The local bakery started putting out these oatmeal cranberry cookies that are super deeelicious, and they go great with the Hawaiian coffee I get sent to me by the growers. Yeah, I have lots of reasons to smile. Obviously, some are more inconsequential than others but even if small things are worth celebrating, might as well celebrate them.
My life has stayed fairly simple and happy through the various phases I've gone through. But, I feel I'm ready for a little more now. I really want to find someone to share the good things in my life with and someone who will share the good things in her life with me. I'd like someone who lets me make her life even more full , someone with the self esteem to believe that romance and love can be for real. A little adventure, excitement, and lots of fun should be the theme early in a relationship but it should be able to grow to enrich both of us, to make us better and healthier people. Who I'm looking for to share that relationship with is hard to describe. I suppose it starts with being a good person, not too selfish, who likes to be somewhat active, and can see the good in others.
It's hard to say how much people need to have in common to be good with each other. The superficial things probably aren't that important but it helps to have some things in common, like music for instance. Fortunately, I can find myself in the groove with a wide variety of tunes: from reggae to Foo Fighters and Muse, from bebop jazz to neosoul jazz, from classical music to classic rock, from sexy house music to fugal electronica, from vocalists singing sweet love songs to the punk rock of my youth. It probably helps if both people like the same type of restaurants. I usually opt for Japanese or Korean restaurants but that's just my upbringing. I'll try anything. There are several cross cultural gastropubs near me doin' great small plates - most recently I had blue cheese mashed potatoes and peanut sauce beef satay with an amber ale. Ohh Yeahh. It probably helps if our work schedules are similar ( I work long and hard on T and Th so that I have more freedom on MWFs). And, it probably helps if people have a similar rhythm to how often they need to be wild and how often they need to be calm and peaceful. But, it's hard to say. People can be a little different and still make that beautiful music together, still synchronize just right. Usually it's a mutually satisfactory compromise that leads to a beautiful thing. Although, maybe there's someone out there for each of us with whom compromise is unnecessary, where both people know what the other one wants, and likes it, where the passion is undeniable...Can you imagine?... A bit idealistic probably. Relationships can be so complicated, especially in the beginning. But, you never know....Sometimes it's just a matter of going for it.
Lets find the good things together; a little adventure, a little excitement, some fun, and who knows.... maybe a lot more.