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Dating Milestones Decoded


Those telling moments when you know your relationship is really going somewhere.

By Chelsea Kaplan

t’s been said that when you know someone’s right for you, you just know. But sometimes it takes more than a gut feeling. Sometimes it requires your girlfriend to do something truly loving and meaningful for you to realize that you’re on the road to forever. We asked women around the country to share with us their relationship-sealing moment. Here’s what they had to say. See if you can relate!

When she ditched her job
“My girlfriend is super-hot and used to work as a bartender at one of the most popular
“It really proved to me that I was her first priority and that she respected my feelings.”
lesbian bars in New York. I’m definitely the jealous type, so her job never made me happy. After we’d been together for over a year, I told her how uncomfortable her job made me, and she said right there on the spot that she’d quit. The next day, she did. It really proved to me that I was her first priority and that she respected my feelings.”
—Kara, 27, Brooklyn, NY

When she dressed up
“My girlfriend is not the lipstick type, and she makes no apologies for it. When she agreed to wear a dress to my brother’s wedding in order to avoid the fallout of donning a tux, I knew that she was going way out of her way to make me happy. It made me realize she cared for me in a very deep way.”
—Perri, 26, Charlottesville, VA

When she took care of me during a crisis
“About four months into dating my current girlfriend, I was diagnosed with breast cancer and had to have an emergency mastectomy and begin radiation treatments. Needless to say, it was a very serious situation—definitely something a bit heavy for someone to handle so early in a relationship. Even though we hadn’t been together long, she was an unbelievable source of support; she drove me to and from doctor’s appointments and the hospital and took care of me during the treatments. She also served as a liaison between me and my friends and family when I was too tired to deal with them. Even though it was a terrible experience, it showed me what a fantastic person she is. We’ve been together nearly seven years now, and I’m totally cancer-free…and in love.”
—Jenelle, 38, Framingham, MA

When she became “religious” for me
“I knew my girlfriend was a keeper when she, a staunch atheist, began participating in the Shabbat dinners I host every Friday night. She actually got into learning about the tradition and customs surrounding the Jewish ritual and now she even enjoys it, despite
“It took a lot for her to do that, but it was really an amazing act of wanting to please me.”
not subscribing to the religious beliefs. We’re now engaged, and she even agreed to have a Jewish wedding when we get married next year.”
—Deborah, 36, Bellevue, WA

When she let me make her over
I am a makeup artist, and, as luck would have it, my girlfriend is the most natural woman on the planet. She never wears makeup, doesn’t shave and doesn’t care about her clothes at all. I have always thought she was beautiful just the way she is, but secretly wished I could get my hands on her to just clean her up a bit. One day she came to me and said, ‘Sara, I know you make people over for a living, and I’d like you to take a crack at me—just don’t change me too much!’ All I did was pluck her eyebrows and let her borrow my razor, but the difference it made was incredible. I knew she did it to make me happy. Which it did!”
—Sara, 28, Athens, GA

When she moved to be closer to me
“I met my girlfriend when I went to New York City to visit a friend. We were instantly attracted to each other, but because I live in L.A., we couldn’t exactly begin a serious relationship right off the bat. We dated long distance for about six months, and then one day she said that we had to live in the same place in order to really see if we could really make it. She then told me she had already gone and found a new job and was moving to L.A.! I was so excited—it was a really huge step for us as a couple. She’s been here almost a year now, and we’re going strong.”
—Charlotte, 33, West Hollywood, CA

When she gave up meat
“I am vegan, so when I started dating meat-loving Irene, I never thought it would work. After giving her the hard sell for months, she said she’d try giving up meat for a week, claiming she wouldn’t be able to make it for the whole seven days. Well, one week turned into a month, which turned into a year. She’s been meat-free for 14 months now! I found what she did so great that she made that sacrifice for me, not to mention sexy.”
—Isobel, 33, Chicago, IL

When she became more sexually adventurous
“I was always the sexual instigator in my relationship, and even though I figured everyone has her role, it always bummed me out. I knew I’d resent my girlfriend if I never said anything to her, so I brought it up. That following weekend, she surprised me in bed with all sorts of stuff she had bought at a sex shop! It took a lot for her to do that, but it was really an amazing act of wanting to please me.”
—Zoe, 33, Bayside, NY


Chelsea Kaplan is a freelance writer who frequently contributes to Happen magazine.
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