Cold-Weather Dates Gone Wrong
No luck with dating this holiday season? These true tales of winter romance gone awry are sure to put you in a more festive mood in no time — and help you avoid making the same mistakes!
s the air turns frosty and the snow begins to fall, romance warms the souls of those brave enough to venture outside. And while the wintery weather is perfect for cuddling with that special someone, it can also become a brutal battle with Mother Nature. Check out these true tales of cold-weather courtship — and the merry mishaps that made them memorable!
"My girlfriend and I were trapped inside during a terrible blizzard a few years ago. It was Christmas time, so we decided to just curl up under a blanket, watch Christmas movies… and light a fire. As we were
sitting on the floor near the fireplace, we both smelled something burning. Thinking it was the fireplace, we guessed it would just go away — but then I looked down and saw that the blanket we were under was on fire! An ember must've jumped out from the fireplace and set the thing ablaze. Luckily, we snuffed it out before either of us got burned."
|Luckily, we snuffed it out before either of us got burned.|
– Will, 28-year-old attorney, Ohio
Look out below!
"A date and I went for a winter hike. It was cold, but the sun was out and the icicles were starting to melt off of the trees. We were walking along the trail, holding hands — when all of a sudden, we heard a loud crack from what seemed like far away. A second later, a giant icicle fell out of the sky and landed right on my date's head. Luckily, it didn't knock him out or draw blood or anything, but he definitely went down. We both had a good laugh about it after he was OK. How does that happen?!"
– Meg, 26-year-old marketing coordinator, New York
"When I was a kid, my family would drive around the neighborhood on Christmas Eve and look at all the lights. So [my] freshman year of college, I thought that would be a nice thing to do with my girlfriend back home. But we decided to drive to a random neighborhood instead of one we both knew. Bad idea! It was dark and snowy, and I ended up turning the wrong way down a one-way street. The lights were nice, but the ticket for reckless driving wasn't."
– Neil, 29-year-old financial analyst, Vermont
Out with the old, in with the pneu…
"My boyfriend and I decided to do the Coney Island Polar Bear Club's Polar Bear Plunge on New Year's Day last year. We both thought it would be…not fun, but exciting, a challenge and something to talk about. Believe it or not, swimming in the frozen Atlantic Ocean isn't as fun as it sounds — especially for my boyfriend, who caught pneumonia. He was sick for about three weeks, and any sexual exhilaration we got from the experience was killed by, well, shrinkage."
– Jackie, 28-year-old senior business analyst, New York
The tooth hurts
"I took a date out to dinner on a pretty calm winter night. It wasn't snowing when we went into the restaurant, but by the time we left, there was almost a foot of snow on the ground. It was pretty, though, so no big deal — until my car got stuck in the mud outside the restaurant. I got behind it to push while she steered, slipped on a patch of ice, and chipped my front tooth on the back bumper. I looked like Jim Carrey
from Dumb & Dumber for about a month."
|Halfway between floors, the entire mall lost power.|
– Chris, 37-year-old gym owner, California
Putting the fart before the horse
"I thought a horse-and-carriage ride for my wife and I would be a nice cold weather date, so we went to the park where they set those up every winter and climbed in. It was a nice night — not too cold — and we were looking forward to a relaxing trip through the park. I don't know what they fed the horse before it went 'on duty,' but [because we were] sitting behind it, we had to use the blankets to cover our noses the entire time. Not exactly a winter wonderland!"
– Jeremy, 38-year-old author, New Jersey
A different kind of holiday trip
"There's a coffee shop near me that makes delicious hot chocolate during winter. So, I treated my girlfriend and her mother to some. They sat down at a table, and I grabbed the cups from the counter. Walking back, I completely bit it over a chair [that] someone left sticking out. Not only did I spill scorching hot chocolate on my girlfriend and her mother, I also got some on a little kid nearby — who of course started crying and wouldn't stop. The coffee shop gave us refills; I let my girlfriend carry them out."
– Carlos, 29-year-old editor, New York
"I met a girl at the mall Christmas shopping one year, and we kinda hit it off right away. On a whim, I asked her if she wanted to stick around inside while the snow calmed down and go upstairs to the food court to grab something to eat. She agreed, and we got in the elevator — the glass one, right in the middle of the mall — to head upstairs. Halfway between floors, the entire mall lost power. We spent about 45 minutes trapped together as people looked on from below. Some first date."
– Jeff, 22-year-old student, Pennsylvania
Rudolph, the red-light reindeer
"My city has an annual "Light Up Night," which is the night when they light the Christmas tree in the middle of town. My girlfriend and I went and we were having a great time, but the place got super-crowded. So I suggested driving to a part of town that was a little higher up, where we could look down. We had plenty of time until the ceremony, but we hit every possible red light on the way and missed the lighting [itself]. But there's a happy ending, because we ended up getting the best view of the city and enjoyed the lights together with no one else around to block our view."
– John, 32-year-old editor, New York
Matt Christensen has written for such publications as Maxim, The Cleveland Plain Dealer and WWE Magazine.