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Why I Never Called Again…


Ladies: Do you want to know the truth about why you never heard from her again? These stories might offer a clue.

By Chelsea Kaplan

ver been tempted to track down a long-lost date just to find out why she never called again? Well, we went to the trouble for you, asking women around the country to fess up to the real reason they didn’t pursue a second round. We’re not suggesting we found your old flame, but maybe one of these stories rings true just the same.

She brought a friend on our date
“I made a date to meet a woman for dinner and was surprised when she showed up with a friend. At first
She was totally unapologetic too, which made the situation even worse.
I thought they had just run into each other, but it soon became clear that she’d planned it from the start. It was so weird—I felt like a third wheel. Was the friend there in case I proved to be boring? Or to say whether she approved of me? It was like I was on Candid Camera or something! She saw absolutely nothing wrong or rude about it. Which is why she never heard from me again.”
– Beth, 26, San Diego, CA

She didn’t appreciate my plans
“I am a foodie and I like to treat my dates to something special, so I thought it would be cool if I took a woman I really wanted to impress to a hot new restaurant. I explained beforehand that the restaurant was upscale and on the formal side, so I suggested that we should get dressed up a bit. Well, she showed up in jeans and a ripped t-shirt that was printed to look like a tuxedo, and the restaurant refused to let us in because they have a no-jeans policy. I was so ticked off at her because she knew I was trying to do something special for us and that I’d invested time and energy—and that I really wanted to eat at that place! She was totally unapologetic too, which made the situation even worse.”
– Jen, 28, New York, NY

She grilled me
“I’m all for getting to know someone on the first date, but when I had coffee with Donna, she made me feel as if I were on a job interview. She was so serious and asked me all of these questions like, ‘Tell me about your last
It was just so weird that I nearly busted out laughing right in the middle of the kiss.
relationship—what worked and what didn’t?’ and ‘How soon after meeting someone do you know if they’re relationship material? How soon do you think about living together?’ I felt totally overwhelmed and pressured—and that’s why I didn’t call her again.”
– Marita, 41, Hoboken, NJ

She went overboard with her jokes
“I was set up on a blind date with Molly. The friend who set us up described her as ‘spunky,’ which I liked. As it turned out, it was more like ‘rude’ and ‘totally offensive.’ She told mean-spirited jokes and made what she thought were humorously disparaging remarks about our waiter, the other people at the restaurant—everyone! Maybe once you know her, that kind of humor goes over better, but it was a total turn-off to me. I really wish she had toned it down! I ended the date quickly and never called her again.”
– Candice, 32, Falls Church, VA

She got too touchy-feely
“Once, after a first date, the woman walked me home and kissed me outside my door. She also grabbed my butt. Actually, she didn’t just grab, she clenched and squeezed it throughout the whole kiss, totally groping me. There’s no way to describe the shock and surprise I felt. It was just so weird that I nearly busted out laughing right in the middle of the kiss. It wasn’t romantic or sexy at all—it was totally gross, and all I wanted to do was get back into my apartment and away from her! Save the groping till you know someone better!”
– Mary, 24, Austin, TX


Chelsea Kaplan is deputy editor at www.thefamilygroove.com.
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