Q and A With… Drew Barrymore

The star gives us a few words of wisdom on tough love, romance and appreciating what you have in a relationship.

In He’s Just Not That Into You, Jennifer Aniston’s storyline deals with whether or not a couple should live together or just get married. What do you think about marriage?

I believe in it, absolutely.

It was interesting to see both sides of the coin—how a guy can live with a girl and yet not believe in marriage.

Yeah, what’s so great about it is that society says a relationship should look a certain way, when the truth is it doesn’t have to fit a mold. Love exists in many different capacities, and we shouldn’t box people in and make them feel bad just because they don’t fit some ideal. There’s also a fun aspect to it; when you let go and just let people be who they are, ironically, sometimes they come around.

So, I don’t think you can force someone into it. That doesn’t work. It just doesn’t. Everything has to be voluntary, by choice. I really love the relationship in this storyline. It’s got great layers to it—Jen’s character wants to be married, and yet she looks around and there are these married guys who are not contributing to their respective relationships, unlike her own live-in boyfriend. To appreciate what you have is a really great thing.

Ginnifer Goodwin’s character seems quite desperate in her romantic pursuits. Why do people get that desperate?

Sometimes you just can’t help yourself. You just like someone so much that you’ll do anything you can to be with them. I think if the other person isn’t doing that, too, then that’s where you go wrong. It’s not that you’re wrong for trying and being excited about love and being a hopeless romantic. I don’t want to ever judge that. I just think it has to be reciprocated.

Why does the unavailable person have so much appeal?

A lot of people want what they can’t have. But, eventually, I hope they learn that if someone doesn’t want you, you shouldn’t waste your time with that person, because it’s only going to make you feel bad.

Do you like or hate blind dates?

Blind dates seem a little scary! I like dating, but blind dates are kind of crazy. I would like a blind date if it was totally fair game to walk in and say, “No, thank you, good night. I apologize, but I know this is not going to work.”

Who do you go to for romantic advice?

My partner, Nan, and my best friend, Chris. And by the way, my romantic failures have nothing to do with them. It’s because I didn’t listen!

Do you think a girl should call a guy?

Yeah, I don’t think there are rules.

What’s the best pickup line you’ve ever heard?

Nobody ever really feeds me lines, really. I can’t admit it, but I totally tried this angle with one guy and he was, like, “Yeah, you can call my friend, and ask him.” And I said, “Awesome! Thanks!” So humiliating!

It seems like Ginnifer’s friends wanted to treat her with kid gloves rather than tell her the truth about her dating behavior. What do you think audiences will learn as a result of watching this film?

That people should not ask their friends for the dating/ relationship advice that makes them feel better. We need honesty and truthfulness—that’s what will really help us learn. Coddling gets you nowhere. Tough love will get you so much further!

Contributing entertainment editor Susan L. Hornik is based in Los Angeles.
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