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Dating Milestones For Gay Couples


How did you know your guy was special? Check out these surefire indicators that your relationship is really going somewhere.

By Chelsea Kaplan

emember back when your boyfriend did something so thoughtful, it immediately won your heart? Maybe it was when he took you to his parents’ 50th anniversary party. Or the time he made you chicken soup when you had strep throat. We asked guys around the country what made them realize their relationship was moving in the right direction.


“I am seeing a guy who is a waiter. Before we got together, he dated a guy he worked with. Their breakup was not only rough because it was a workplace romance, but also because all
“All that was important to him was getting to know my family and seeing where I
grew up.”
the people who worked at the restaurant were friends. In fact, they were trying to convince them to get back together! It took a while for him to introduce me to his restaurant friends because he feared everyone being involved in his love life again. When he finally did, I knew he was making a big statement: He had moved on and his friends had to forget getting him back together with his ex.”
— Sean, 27, Tualatin, OR


“While I love my two cats, my boyfriend hates them. One weekend I had to travel home to tend to a family emergency and he offered to take care of them without my even asking. I know any good friend — or lover — should offer to do something like that, but knowing how much he really couldn’t stand my cats made a real statement about how much he cared for me.”
— Will, 34, St. Louis, MO


“My boyfriend, Peter, is from a very wealthy, old-money family. I, on the other hand, grew up working-class. I put off bringing him home to meet my family for a long time, but after he begged and begged to meet them, I finally had to relent. I thought he’d be mortified when he saw my parents’ shack and sat down to the meal of Stove-Top stuffing and precooked ham, but he was just as gracious and into it as if he’d been served beef Wellington on a silver platter. All that was important to him was getting to know my family and seeing where I grew up.”
— Dan, 30, Chicago, IL


“I am addicted to watching my favorite television programs, but my boyfriend couldn’t care less about TV—he didn’t even own one! When we first started dating, we were spending virtually every night together, usually at his place. One evening we went to his house, and I noticed a brand-new television in his living room with a big bow on top. He told me that he bought it for me because he wanted me to feel like his home was like my own. In my heart, that move really won me over.”
— Christian, 33, Roswell, GA


“My boyfriend, along with the chef at my favorite restaurant, once made me a surprise birthday dinner. The central ingredient of the meal was Brussels sprouts. At dinner, I asked
“I knew it meant he was interested in stepping out of his comfort zone and into mine…”
about the prominence of Brussels sprouts and he told me that he had specially arranged for them because he remembered that they were my favorite vegetable. The truth is, I hate Brussels sprouts, but I thought it was so endearing that he made such an effort, I didn’t tell him the truth. I loved that he went to such trouble to include my ‘favorite’ food.”
— Gordon, 35, Washington, DC


“When my boyfriend Tom and I began dating, I was always trying to get him to go dancing with me, but he’s much more of a sports bar kind of a guy, so he was never into it. One day after we’d been together for a few months, Tom said, ‘You know what? I think we need to go dancing.’ It may not seem like a huge deal—especially for a gay man, but for him to suggest that, I knew it meant he was interested in stepping out of his comfort zone and into mine just to make me happy.”
— Dean, 28, San Jose, CA


“A few months into dating my current boyfriend, my lease was up on my apartment. He came with me to look at new ones, and we were having a hard time finding something I liked. In the middle of yet another disappointing option, he said, ‘I don’t even know why we’re doing this—you know you need to move in with me!’ He’s extremely particular about having his space and his privacy, so I knew this was a big milestone for us. It’s been three years, and I still haven’t moved out!”
— Kerry, 33, Stamford, CT


“My boyfriend is a hairdresser at a very high-end salon in New York where people wait months to see him. Our friends are always asking him to do their hair, but he likes to leave work at work, so he makes up excuses. About two months into our relationship, I brought him home with me for Christmas. My mom and sister were going to a mother-daughter holiday party. Before they left for the event, he offered to cut and style their hair. You would have thought they had won a million dollars—they couldn’t have been more excited. And he was so into making them look beautiful. That’s when I saw a whole different, nurturing side of him. I think I fell in love with him during that visit.”
— Marc, 28, New York, NY


Chelsea Kaplan is deputy editor at www.thefamilygroove.com
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