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Men reveal: “Why I date younger women”

Men reveal: “Why I date younger women”

By Tobey Grumet Segal

Ever feel like all the men your age are dating women half your age? OK, maybe not half your age, but you get the idea. What makes men attracted to women a decade or more younger than themselves? Is it just about looks and our youth-centric culture? Well, that’s part of it. But you might be surprised to learn the real reasons that go way beyond physical attraction: as it turns out, men are a bit more complicated than that!

It’s all about the law of averages as you get older
“When you reach your mid-40s, it’s not so much that dating a younger woman becomes more attractive, it’s just harder not to date them. The law of averages means that proportionately fewer women your age are single. But dating a woman in her late 20s/early 30s when you’re approaching 50 is also less demanding; you’re not faced with the same requirements to make a decision about your future. When your new girlfriend is 38, she expects you’re thinking about the next few years, not just the next few dates.”
— Christopher, 46, Chicago, IL

Their carefree attitudes make younger women more appealing
“I’d say the allure is that younger women are less judgmental and less set in their ways. They don’t have a laundry list of what they want in a partner, a career or even life just yet. Younger women are more friendly, I suppose. I think that kind of attitude appeals to guys my age who want a relationship to really be on their terms.”
— Larry, 43, Edison, NJ
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They let me embrace my inner goofball on dates
“Honestly, younger women are sometimes more open to having goofy good times than a woman who has a few years on her. You can invite them to the midnight showing of Thor: The Dark World without getting a skeptical look.”
— Marlon*, 41, Atlanta, GA

Fewer years of dating equals less emotional baggage to carry
“The appealing thing about younger women is their outlook on life. They tend to be untainted by experiences that have hardened older women. For example, when a woman’s been lied to a lot after years of dating, she always thinks that you’re lying to her, too. And that’s a turn-off. Younger women are less cynical, and that’s a big draw.”
— Alan*, 52, New York, NY

Dating without an agenda means having more fun together
“What makes a younger woman a good catch? She’s not itching to have a ring on her finger. She’s interested in the here and now, in going out, in having fun. It may sound like a cliché, but it’s reality. I’m not anti-marriage, I’m just anti-agenda. A younger woman seems more willing to let things take their natural course.”
— Roger, 37, New York, NY

The ego boost helps me maintain my health and vitality
“When a guy reaches a certain age, he worries he will see his youth and vitality wane. A younger woman reaffirms for me that I’ve still got it going on.”
— Mike, 48, Orlando, FL

Impressing a younger date is easier
“One advantage of dating a younger woman is that you can play ‘cruise director’ — i.e., show her all your secret favorite places that she probably hasn’t experienced yet. They’re easier to impress and very willing to be escorted around. Women like it when you have a plan and it’s well-executed.”
— Bill, 39, New York, NY

*Some names have been changed to protect their privacy.

Tobey Grumet Segal is a New York-based freelance writer whose work has appeared in Self, New York, The New York Observer and Modern Bride, among others.



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